tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31118820562400687002024-03-12T20:33:29.514-07:00Blog: Part DeuxSarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.comBlogger153125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-47976177001755415272012-04-19T17:20:00.002-07:002012-04-19T17:25:59.263-07:00weedy.luke and i are currently renting a small bungalow house that has no grass in the front and backyards. the idea behind this landscaping choice was that grass, being notorious for its water consumption, is not eco-friendly and so the family that owns this house decided instead to put in drought-tolerant plants and mulch over larger areas not planted with anything. this sounded great to luke and i - lower utility costs! woot!<br />
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sadly, it's become increasingly clear, especially after the first big rain during our first winter here, that mulch doesn't hold up well to the elements when used as a full-backyard landscaping tool. therefore, our yards are essentially dirt, which really wouldn't bother me at all, except for this environment is excellent for breeding weeds. everywhere. every. where.<br />
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for the first year we lived here, luke and i were really good about catching the weeds when they were tiny sprouts, and ripping them out of the ground with glee. however, it soon became obvious that weeding a completely bare yard is a full-time commitment - for realz. it is constant. in addition, i actually started to like the addition of green plants to the brown backyard landscape and the dog really likes jumping through the tall weed stalks when we play ball. thus, the plan to just ignore the weeds was born.<br />
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this plan has been working out pretty well for us. the backyard is full of lush greenery and if you squint (or, like me, don't wear your prescription glasses at home), it looks like there are just a bunch of legitimate plants basking in the sun out there. i actually kinda loved it.<br />
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...until today, when for some reason the weeds became less like pleasant alternatives to gray mulch and more like an indication of what a terrible mess my life is and how horrible i am at being a grown adult.* thus, after i swept all the errant pieces of mulch off our patio and completely re-organized our "potting station" (i.e. the stainless steel kitchen counter we had no place for, and thus stuck in the backyard as a place for me to place new plants into pots each spring, hopeful i will spring a green thumb, only to forget to water them for days at a time, effectively killing everything), i decided to start digging out weeds. most were almost hip-high on me and were therefore almost impossible for me to rip out with my hands. i grabbed a small trowel and, sans gardening gloves, ** i made my way across the yard just in front of the patio, manically removing all the weeds. i did this for a very long time (or at least what seemed like forever) and paused only to wipe the sweat from my face. i took a "before" photo of one portion of the yard, meaning to clear the entire frame of weeds before i stopped today, and i totally would have powered through had i not literally felt my skin slide off after i attacked a particularly vicious root with the trowel. i had managed to get a blister <i>and</i> pop it <i>and</i> tear my skin off in one weeding experience. so proud. i then had to wash all the dirt off of my bare hands and out of my exploded blister with antibacterial soap, which was <i>so fun</i>.<br />
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all in all, i think my bandaged hand was worth it. my plan is to go get some gloves tomorrow and continue on saturday. THERE WILL BE NO MORE GREEN on the left side of these photographs come sunday. NONE. (well, except for on the fence, because, you know, privacy.)<br />
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*luke and i had an extreme tax season this year, what with his new, declared small business and both of us working as "independent contractors" and such. we owed a bunch of money until i entered in all the tuition i paid in 2011. dear student loans: thanks for that. the intensity of taxes made me realize that i definitely need to get my shit together. no more "oops, i had no idea adult life worked that way, so i'm getting shafted." no. will not let it happen. i will pull up all the weeds until i feel responsible again.<br />
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**my lack of gloves, and my inability to remember to buy them, was a huge reason i've ignored the out of control weed problem for so long. today, i figured i should probably take advantage of the superhuman powers my sudden cleaning frenzy had granted me and just deal with the backyard, even without gloves.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-26920323529587261422012-04-04T22:25:00.001-07:002012-04-04T22:28:40.570-07:00spring breakthroughtoday marks the first day in three that i haven't had a splitting migraine from the moment i woke up to the moment i went to sleep. i try to be a grown up these days and not panic at the slightest deviance from normal health and therefore, i was not immediately convinced that there was a brain aneurysm happening, but i got close. so, imagine how pleased i am that it was not, in fact, that i was bleeding out into my skull - rather, i had a killer hormonal headache* paired with pretty top notch sinus congestion. it's better now, so all is well.<br />
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in other news, i started my last quarter of my master's coursework yesterday. i don't know how i feel about it. i mean, i'm by no means done, as i'll still have to research and write a thesis. if i'm feeling hopeful, i think i can finish that by december. if i'm feeling fatalistic, i feel like it will never get done. in addition, now i'm thinking i may get a second master's, in something like education (a decision part of me feels i should have made two years ago - hindsight being 20/20 and all). however, there is a satisfaction in knowing that after june, come what may with thesis nonsense, my life is my own again. i will have a completely free schedule and will be able to work <i>for money</i> again, assuming i can find someone to hire me. the good news is, though, that after months and months and months of having zero clue what i'd pursue post-graduation, i have a plan: i know i want to teach. i've always loved to teach, i've always loved education, i've always advocated for passionate teachers and engaging curriculum. that has always been a major passion in my life, and i think i would regret it for the rest of time if i continue to deny its importance to me. therefore, i have a LIFE GOAL for once in my goddamn life. now i just have to decide at what level i'll be teaching. i love children, love preschool, love how incredibly brilliant children can be and how remarkable it is to watch them understand concepts most people think are beyond them. so that's the plan.<br />
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and honestly, to have plan is pretty awesome.<br />
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*i apologize for the overshare. however, i've gotten really shameless in my old age.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-82362673204971433412012-03-30T16:58:00.001-07:002012-03-30T17:07:10.648-07:00no money, mo' problems (part 2)i think anyone who knows me personally could tell you i'm not a huge fan of the conservative movement in this country, for much the same reason i'm not a huge fan of people who eat too loud, spit on the sidewalk or are just generally totally inconsiderate of the people around them. i was raised by parents who emphasized the importance of staying the hell out of other people's business. if it's your personal issue and you don't feel like sharing it with me, i respect that. i'll be here waiting to help you anyway, if you ever need to ask. i feel like that's just a normal human consideration of other human beings' right to make their own decisions.<br />
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thus, the conservative attempts to legislate what people who are not conservative can do with their bodies or with their love offends me not just politically - it offends me morally. if we're talking morality here, people, let's consider how morally offensive it is to dare to force your personal opinions on people who don't share your viewpoint. ugh. it's hypocritical and gross and i can't deal with it.<br />
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however, i have decided that when i have children, while i will be raising them as tiny heathens who (gasp!) respect and love everyone<i> because </i>of their differences, i will be taking one page from a conservative handbook: namely, i will teach my children how to manage their money. i grew up in an incredibly fortunate family, where money was never an issue and i always had more than enough. that was wonderful and there is no non-disgusting way of complaining about it. unfortunately, because money was there and because it was used for things like food and clothes and sports uniforms (and not vacation houses or trips to europe), it became something that was never discussed. taken for granted, perhaps. a middle class existence was expectation, and as such, while we never felt money as a motivator (something i am very grateful for), we also never learned how to go without. because of this, i graduated from college, jobless, and continued to eat out, drive around all the time, refused to move back home to save money, etc. again, i did nothing extravagant - i just didn't know to live within my very different budget. <br />
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the terrible thing is i still do it. i still operate under the assumption that despite not living with or being supported by my parents who are <i>twenty years </i>more advanced in their careers than i am, i can spend money like i am.<br />
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so, conservatives, teach me how to keep my children out of debt, how to force them to start funds for college <i>and</i> for home ownership, how to get them to understand living within one's means.<br />
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this liberal hippy has no idea how to do it.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-32276794845673140052012-02-06T09:51:00.000-08:002012-02-06T09:54:20.063-08:00food fight.i'm currently simultaneously not working AND not panicking about that for the time being, which is a feat in and of itself (luke is supporting us until i finish coursework in june, as a) we can afford that sort of one-income family crap for a few months and b) both of us working twelve hour days = two grown married people living in college dorm squalor). however, as much as this arrangement lessens the crazy money perma-stress i've been carrying around for pretty much the entirety of my grad school career, it has illuminated to me yet another problem: namely, i am a terrible cook. as in, horrible. i have one staple meal that is delicious, but as it is a spicy, bean-heavy veggie chili, it is not acceptable for daily consumption (at least not in a world where we want to fit into our jeans on a daily basis). also, i make a mean veggie saute that can be eaten over microwaveable trader joe's rice (or, in the case of the photo below, an israeli couscous quinoa mixture that i had to actually <i>boil</i> - can you believe it?).<br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">however, aside from these two culinary masterpieces, i am hopeless. i attempted to make a potato and pea curry the other night and it was such an epic failure i couldn't photograph it because i was too busy crying in the bathroom about what a huge waste of time and money it was.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">it almost makes me miss the days we ate out all the time. i am actually pretty convinced that when one's definition of "dining out" is "subway sandwiches and bean and rice plates from baja fresh," it's actually cheaper to eat out than it is to cook at home. more importantly, it's easier, which is good enough for me.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
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</div>Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-84301552429708814032012-01-24T23:48:00.000-08:002012-01-24T23:48:30.048-08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyYoPN1birC8Bz52wwQ1jwtfThJ9Ftc7QAz9RlpPzlej1WLejxZTDclTsktHfheRatcPGWBET7snDEqRPJzpexgbLGBwdsP4RviPC6sCHRU9yQWr57QdgIxkgI3fqezLqkhkOGkPeWEsat/s1600/Photo+14.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyYoPN1birC8Bz52wwQ1jwtfThJ9Ftc7QAz9RlpPzlej1WLejxZTDclTsktHfheRatcPGWBET7snDEqRPJzpexgbLGBwdsP4RviPC6sCHRU9yQWr57QdgIxkgI3fqezLqkhkOGkPeWEsat/s320/Photo+14.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">also, a necklace, which i adore.</div>Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-46584275641834381282012-01-22T19:35:00.000-08:002012-01-22T19:35:47.261-08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjo66ysn5BSTCi6TxsLMpFu_nT2Lmw1MIZvUPsLerjJL093LlJXKPJ5cCtAHo_93uHUBlhTCiINhK9i3gNcs93VVhJjVFnmb4o37VtvcXNbwn93RAbDTMuGPnPPCqqxGspZTLCg_O73sBBp/s1600/Photo+on+2012-01-22+at+19.30+%25232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjo66ysn5BSTCi6TxsLMpFu_nT2Lmw1MIZvUPsLerjJL093LlJXKPJ5cCtAHo_93uHUBlhTCiINhK9i3gNcs93VVhJjVFnmb4o37VtvcXNbwn93RAbDTMuGPnPPCqqxGspZTLCg_O73sBBp/s320/Photo+on+2012-01-22+at+19.30+%25232.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">when the going gets tough, the tough get crafting. i made myself some earrings tonight. they're simple, but they're awesome and, although you can't see it so clearly in the super high-res photobooth picture above, they are turquoise, so i am, of course, in love.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">(also, this is a pretty excellent photo of the damage the animals have done to our living room blinds.)</div><div><br />
</div>Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-55183599529766539822012-01-22T14:41:00.000-08:002012-01-22T14:41:42.039-08:00sad face.i'm about to begin the third week of winter quarter, so i'm having to work even harder at staying positive and present. the past year and a half has taught me that the least healthy thing i can be doing right now is try to see into the future, because that makes me panic about where i'll work, how i'll make this worth it, when i'll finally be able to contribute financially to our lives, when we'll be able to buy a house, etc. etc. etc. obsessing over this makes me feel guilty about going back to school, because i feel like it put our lives on hold and incurred new debt for essentially no reason. i have to remind myself that i'm only 25 and, regardless of how horrible this limbo period feels, it's completely acceptable for me to still be working on my life. still, though, bllllargh. i'm over it.<br />
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luke and i have spent the weekend lazing around, mostly. i caught up on all the reading i've been avoiding for a while and luke is currently still trying to jam all our hundreds of dvds into genre-coordinated cases. i've been in a bit of a fog for the last few days - just really not feeling up to being a big ball of sunshine. nothing is particularly miserable. i'm just ready for the next phase, i guess, and hopeful that this glorious next phase will include some clarity and a paycheck.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-63847915753517073982012-01-05T20:58:00.000-08:002012-01-22T14:35:21.863-08:00photo phun.because i am always about two to three years behind technologically, i got my first smartphone just last december (as in, 2010), which means i've been taking photos with my cell phone for about a year. i've decided that another good way of focusing on the positive would be to catalog all the good stuff associated with last year through pictures i took on my fancy mobile device.*<br />
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things i love (and therefore photograph):<br />
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a) the husband.<br />
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b) the dog.<br />
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c) huck.<br />
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d) abe.<br />
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e) siblings.<br />
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f) my parents (i had no cell phone photos of them, so i cheated. they had to make the list!)<br />
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g) my grandparents, these gorgeous people.<br />
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h) this place.<br />
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i) babies.<br />
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j) backyards.<br />
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k) california.<br />
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l) this.<br />
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m) mariachis.<br />
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n) fun times.<br />
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this is by no means an exhaustive list, obviously. however, it does make me realize i am a pretty lucky duck.<br />
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</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">*there was probably a much better, more eloquent way to phrase those two sentences, but i'm tired and fighting a migraine and that'll do pig.</div>Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-23679217402020268712012-01-03T15:37:00.000-08:002012-01-03T15:37:03.917-08:00daily affirmations.things to keep in mind:<br />
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a) you are almost finished.<br />
b) you are so close.<br />
c) the people who count will help you.<br />
d) you are not alone.<br />
e) you will make it worth it.<br />
f) you are almost finished.<br />
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think i can keep this up for six more months?Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-90656008669458559092011-12-31T12:51:00.000-08:002011-12-31T12:55:43.229-08:00good times.in lieu of making useless resolutions* i won't hold to (such as the ones i've made previously about cutting out sugar or sarcasm, which were obvious failures), i've decided to cull through the dizzying amount of bad news 2011 brought with it to build a list of all the things that happened this year that i am grateful for, because if i've learned nothing else recently, i've come to understand that life is a process, a <i>journey </i>you might say, and i can't make myself a happier camper by hating on my life or by faking the resolve to change everything overnight. thus, the list of bright lights in 2011:<br />
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1) luke landed a dream job at an incredible private school and also made his book club business official. while the year started off rocky for us financially, it most definitely shaped up to be a time of fantastic opportunity for him, which is of course amazing.<br />
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2) my brother sam graduated from college and moved home, and as sickeningly sweet as this is going to sound, i have truly loved the chance to get to know him again now that we're both grown ups and are less angsty (well, he is at least).<br />
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3) i reconnected with some great people from my hometown and have had the pleasure of hanging out with their adorable babies.<br />
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4) this year alone, i've been employed as an osteologist/archaeologist excavating a cemetery, landed an internship analyzing unknown skeletal remains at the coroner's office and have worked/attended meetings with some pretty remarkable people from the city attorney's office. it's difficult to see it while i'm in it, but this year i've literally fulfilled dreams, doing things i'd only ever read about and been fascinated by. totally worth it.<br />
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5) i still have a 4.0 in school. i'm only acknowledging this because this list is pathetically short and it's technically a good thing, yes? however, during this year of insanity, i've realized that my decade-old love affair with using grades as a barometer for my life success is over. doing well makes all the craziness worth it, i suppose, but i'm definitely ready for a grade point average to stop ruling my life.<br />
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ok, so that was sad - for 365 days of happenings, it's a relatively short list of good things. however, while the bad was pretty bad, the good was exceptionally good. also, this year served as an opportunity to prove to everyone that odd numbered years really are worse than even numbered years. it's not just because i'm a nut, guys! it's true! here's to 2012!<br />
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*i'm notoriously not a person of extremes, so making huge blanket statements about how i'm going to CHANGE EVERYTHING usually don't work out for me.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-25700912820189748152011-12-29T21:03:00.000-08:002011-12-29T21:06:42.681-08:00christmas vacation!i was a little nervous about the holiday season this year, as 2011 has left a pretty sour taste in my mouth and i assumed this trend would continue with glee until 11:59 pm on december 31st. in addition, luke had a raging cold/flu monster for thanksgiving, which was supremely sad, so i had reason to believe things were right on track to be disastrous the whole way through. however, the christmas/hanukkah season literally could not have been better. my mom hosted a fab hanukkah party, complete with a white elephant game in which my grandparents pointedly cheated to allow me to keep a $30 trader joe's gift card, and we ate chinese food like the good jews* we are at a second family party a few days later. the photos** from these events are currently locked in the fort knox that is my mom's digital camera, where pictures enter and yet never leave, so i'll have to wait to post them. suffice to say, though, that they were amazing good times.<br />
<div><br />
</div><div>enter: christmas. luke and i offered to host a christmas day brunch this year, in an effort to a) be grown ups and b) establish some traditions of our own, and while it seemed like an excellent idea in theory, as the day approached, i started to panic a little about having lots of people in our two-bedroom bungalow house, as the only thing that differentiates it from a tiny apartment is that it is free standing and has a backyard. i was a little frantic about having to corral all my family into our living room for hours on end. luckily, christmas day was about 80 degrees in the valley, so we were able to utilize our fabulous patio deck and no one had to sit on anyone else's lap. yay! seating crisis averted, it really was one of the best christmases on record, if i may say so myself. luke made an amazing brunch (...i can take zero credit, as he is the chef of the family), presents were fantastic, and grandparents and aunts stayed for hours and hours. it was super fun and i hope we get to host again next year. loved it.<br />
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i present to you our 6.5 foot tall, 21 inch (at the base) fake christmas tree. we waited until the last minute to get a tree this year, and so i couldn't justify getting a real one, not even for the delicious smell. on friday the 23rd, i went to three different targets and found this gem at the last one. it was so close to christmas, the holiday decor was already on sale, so i scored this bad boy for $25. it's a little silly, a lot adorable and suits our small couch corner just fine. yet another thing about the holidays that actually worked out. imagine that! (this is a horrible photo, and i acknowledge it. my android phone only takes decent pictures if i'm outside and the sun is shining. sad face.)<br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">luke's mom stayed with us for the long christmas weekend and i slipped out on christmas eve for a few hours to visit my dad's side of the family for their first christmas without my grandpa. tradition calls for us to go to knott's berry farm, where i went on exactly one ride. and i didn't sway my log.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-FDFzEkwynAM/Tv1Cf3UukfI/AAAAAAAAAIg/tRGhamXUQ90/s1600/390569_10100965615161296_2506373_65039690_1900122048_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-FDFzEkwynAM/Tv1Cf3UukfI/AAAAAAAAAIg/tRGhamXUQ90/s320/390569_10100965615161296_2506373_65039690_1900122048_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">when i got home on christmas eve, luke gave his mom and i pairs of bear paw slippers. i am such a craze that i wore them for our entire brunch and called myself "santa paws" as i headed out gifts. obviously, luke knows me well.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-j9COuFfWrsw/Tv1B-0xB4wI/AAAAAAAAAIU/Xio-hs3w6tk/s1600/395525_10100966634623286_2506373_65046501_1680025119_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-j9COuFfWrsw/Tv1B-0xB4wI/AAAAAAAAAIU/Xio-hs3w6tk/s320/395525_10100966634623286_2506373_65046501_1680025119_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">here i am absolutely destroying luke in a maze solving contest. i am, as everyone in my grad program can attest, perhaps one of the least competitive people in the world. luke, however, is perhaps one of the most competitive people and makes most (all) things into competitions. therefore, despite the fact that none of you care that i demolished him in this race (he'd been working on it for two minutes before i even opened the box and removed my maze), i'm proud enough of it to post it. can't you just feel his desperation?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9ZXTiWqziM8/Tv1DPkauGqI/AAAAAAAAAIs/CcnGmfzn_Yk/s1600/PC250098.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9ZXTiWqziM8/Tv1DPkauGqI/AAAAAAAAAIs/CcnGmfzn_Yk/s320/PC250098.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">the fam.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-BfP0NMTzW0E/Tv1DrZ91fPI/AAAAAAAAAI4/dIW42tE9nBU/s1600/PC230076.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-BfP0NMTzW0E/Tv1DrZ91fPI/AAAAAAAAAI4/dIW42tE9nBU/s320/PC230076.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">the food (note the lox and bagels).</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-fI3qWMAbLo8/Tv1DyG-_p0I/AAAAAAAAAJE/irunB424uqw/s1600/PC250106.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-fI3qWMAbLo8/Tv1DyG-_p0I/AAAAAAAAAJE/irunB424uqw/s320/PC250106.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">the patio working it's delicious summertime magic.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0kj2Htunrvc/Tv1D6MkW5_I/AAAAAAAAAJQ/8Ij2BaqG2gQ/s1600/PC250109.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0kj2Htunrvc/Tv1D6MkW5_I/AAAAAAAAAJQ/8Ij2BaqG2gQ/s320/PC250109.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">gingerdead men part 1.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-h-j78qDVxeQ/Tv1EKJDTSgI/AAAAAAAAAJc/tmCroeQMK_s/s1600/397234_10100965214554116_2506373_65037622_1907060415_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-h-j78qDVxeQ/Tv1EKJDTSgI/AAAAAAAAAJc/tmCroeQMK_s/s320/397234_10100965214554116_2506373_65037622_1907060415_n.jpg" width="179" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">gingerdead men part 2.***</div></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nnhzLUptBAE/Tv1EcxelACI/AAAAAAAAAJo/qkNYnhuEP9g/s1600/408976_10100967729723696_2506373_65053311_1875668862_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nnhzLUptBAE/Tv1EcxelACI/AAAAAAAAAJo/qkNYnhuEP9g/s320/408976_10100967729723696_2506373_65053311_1875668862_n.jpg" width="179" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">all in all, the holidays were such a success. i am eternally grateful for my incredible extended family. always.</div><br />
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*hilariously, luke, his mom and my dad were the only people at the christmas brunch who never celebrated hanukkah as kids.<br />
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**in addition to ramping up the positivity in this here blog, i am trying to amp up the photos. hopefully it will inspire me to take more.<br />
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***these cookies were really adorable, but so, so difficult to execute (haha!). they're the product of a stamp/cookie cutter luke found online, and the idea is to imprint the dough with the bone shapes, bake the them and then flood the bones with royal icing. and it worked...with these four. i'll need to practice.</div>Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-25053994425414490182011-12-20T21:00:00.000-08:002011-12-20T21:03:12.268-08:00i spent some time this past weekend re-reading some previous entries on this blog, as you do, and i was struck by how funny i used to be (and so modest, too). this was once an outlet for all the ridiculous nonsense i witness with abject horror/gratefulness on a daily basis, and this year, i've turned it into a spinning vortex of pity and sadness. i am now vowing to reverse this trend. it's time to refocus this lens on the positive in life, and if that means making fun of people i see on the freeway, then so be it. i can work on being a better person tomorrow.<br />
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in other news, having just come off of the worst quarter of grad school thus far*, i am delighting in the days when i can literally do nothing. in my life, "doing nothing" still amounts to cutting hundreds of little foot bone shapes out of white felt to construct skeleton christmas stockings to benefit our poor, asbestos-ridden anthropology lab while watching "i survived" and working on christmas gifts, but STILL. i am quasi-relaxed and for the two more weeks i have nowhere to be and nothing of any real importance to do, i am planning on taking full advantage.**<br />
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*this is the truth and therefore, despite it being negative, i will let it stay. this grad school thing has thrown me for a major loop. there's nothing like being a stable, independent adult and going from steady, paid employment to student loan hell to really make a girl reevaluate her priorities. turns out mine are getting out of school and back into the workforce as. soon. as. possible.<br />
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**and by this i mean: eating tons of candy and wearing my pajamas all day long.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-40625586643118344262011-11-28T16:35:00.000-08:002011-11-28T16:35:20.162-08:00i haven't posted in a long time mostly because i think i've been too miserable to articulate what my deal is. and, just like that, my point is proven: ending that sentence with "what my deal is" is pretty much the ultimate cop-out and the best explanation for my blog disappearance.<br />
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on august 12, my grandpa hank died. he'd been diagnosed with lung cancer (and copd) and had had ups and downs for the last five years, but when you're from a family where people live into their 90s as a matter of course and when the only deaths you've had to weather were those of great-grandparents, the thought that your father's father could die at 81 after being relatively stable for a long time just never really computes. in fact, even now, i still haven't quite come to terms with it. part of my issue is that while my relationships with my mom's parents and my maternal great-aunts have grown and flourished as i've become an adult, i didn't really known my paternal grandfather as anything more than the quintessential grandpa, who had unruly curly white hair, wore suspenders, loved antiques and christmas, and smoked a pipe as he rocked in his favorite chair. he was so loving and kind to me and i have that to cherish, but ultimately, i feel like i knew my dad's dad like people know caricatures and it hurts me so deeply that i'll regret that for the rest of my life. my great-grandmother edna, who lived until she was 97 in 2009, was one of the most hilarious, generous, outspoken and wonderful people i have ever known. i miss her constantly and wish she was still here. however, i <i>knew</i> her and therefore, don't regret wasting the time i could have had with her. i didn't know my own grandfather and that's harder for me that i thought it would be.<br />
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in addition, this quarter has been particularly rough at school. there are many facets to the problem, including that i'm taking solely required classes that have little to do with my degree, but i think the greatest issue is that i have officially stopped measuring my success in the world with how well i do in school/the fact that i'm graduate school/how many internships i've got. suddenly, it all seems to mean less to me. the reason for this is that i'm ready to be a functioning adult. i'm ready to have the glorious stability that comes with having a secure job that <i>pays me money</i>. the idea of pursuing a doctorate degree and incurring more debt makes me insane, so i think i'll be a terminal master's student (as if i'm surprised). people like to tell me that at 25, i'm still too young to worry about money and that i should enjoy being in school. however, the reality of being a relatively unemployed student living in los angeles is miserable. i scramble every single month and despite making it a year and a half in grad school without asking my parents for much help, i am gladly accepting funds from them. i'm full aware that i'm making it more miserable by not taking out yearly-salary type loans, but i almost feel like maybe all this craziness will be worth it in a year's time, when i don't have $80,000 in student loans to pay off when the program should have only cost $20,000. ugh. to just graduate already...Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-14435301413572956142011-08-03T12:44:00.000-07:002011-08-03T12:44:03.411-07:00abscessingfirst of all, it's august. how the hell did that happen?<br />
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secondly, it's been on or around ten thousand degrees around these parts recently; so hot in fact that it's blazing in the house even with the air conditioning on. we've gone from freezing ice box in the winter to raging microwave in the summer, all while living in relatively temperate southern california, so i'm definitely of the opinion that there is no insulation in this house. joy.<br />
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thirdly, dess. her abscess surgery was on a wednesday and by saturday, she'd managed to get her paw around the plastic cone and rip out the drain and all her stitches. i rushed her to the emergency vet, where for $100 they told me that it was fine, she'd fine, drains coming out after three days are fine. obviously, the extra expense was nasty, considering i'm unemployed and currently living the lifestyle of an employed person, but i'm happy to report that by tearing out her drain, dess probably did us all a favor. by the following tuesday, less than a week after her surgery, her head looked like this:<br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">amazing. here she is today, officially two weeks from her surgery:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjX_IyRlPDVqq2y2AnmsGexqtWdTFxRpiDqK5lBUG94IUm_SIZ935J5V4qkQ5_DrbB-0_pQZXbe3Y34OUe1uLUgZ_NzUw2BeYXzIfBbN6inCqSsr5SnJXKioL-6DV09qPP5ACSsplfdr5pB/s1600/Dess+Two+Weeks.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjX_IyRlPDVqq2y2AnmsGexqtWdTFxRpiDqK5lBUG94IUm_SIZ935J5V4qkQ5_DrbB-0_pQZXbe3Y34OUe1uLUgZ_NzUw2BeYXzIfBbN6inCqSsr5SnJXKioL-6DV09qPP5ACSsplfdr5pB/s320/Dess+Two+Weeks.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">color me glad that she's better and all healed up and growing back fur. i even sorta appreciate her pawing out her drain, because we'd still be in full cone/drain mode at this point if she hadn't. her only problem now is hating me for being boring all day long. it's too hot to go for a walk until the evening and i'm hesitant to run around with her in the backyard now that i'm personally convinced that the diving around in the mulch-y yard is what caused her eye/head infections. thus, i bore her.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div>Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-92103908053429447042011-07-22T13:31:00.000-07:002011-07-22T13:31:19.066-07:00"it smells like trash in here."*it's been nearly two full days since dess's abscess surgery and she is, for the most part, back to normal (or as normal as she can be with a drain stitched into her head and a plastic cone around her neck). she's learned how to jump onto the bed and the couch (which took a lot of coaxing because the cone impairs her peripheral vision and balance). also, she's eating normally, is fever-free and is generally in a decent mood.<br />
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i, however, spent the entire day yesterday alternating between rolling around in bed moaning like bertha rochester and taking several baths, all in hopes of breaking my intense fever. between tuesday evening at 6 pm and wednesday morning at 1 am, the sniffles and tickly throat i laughed about in my last post exploded into a horrible cold. i seem to always be stunned by how quickly sickness creeps up on me (and my animals), so maybe i should just come to expect going from zero to hero when i'm getting sick. instead, every time i feel diseased, i can't believe it. "i just had a little sore throat. how did this <i>happen to me</i>???" as it is, the fever did break last night and today i am in full drying out mode (occasional deep, "working" chest cough, and sinuses clearing up). we are a motley crew over here right now.<br />
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*according to luke, the only creature in this house who can currently both use his nose and also vocalize his thoughts in english, the house smells disgusting. luckily, i can't smell anything at the moment, so i'm spared the awful task of trying to figure out whether it's the dog's weeping head wound or my trash bags of used kleenex that are stinking up the joint. yum.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-67863795731339293512011-07-20T20:34:00.000-07:002011-07-20T20:34:00.774-07:00one sick puppyquick life updates:<br />
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1) my computer is still broken. i don't see anything forcing me to address that issue until school starts in september. i'm happy to loll around in my laziness at the moment.<br />
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2) i spent monday and tuesday subbing at the preschool where i once taught. i didn't even consider the possibility of getting a cold until i got there and remembered there is no escape. i have worked a total of ten hours there thus far this week and it is only wednesday and KABAM, i already have a sore throat and sniffles. seriously, the military should check out the bioweapons lurking in preschools. i'm sure it would save zillions in medical research.<br />
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3) i applied to a production company to be cast on a paranormal activity investigation reality show over the weekend and scored an on-camera interview yesterday. as hilarious as it was and as pleased as i am to have yet another crazy thing to tell a story about, i absolutely will not be chosen for the position, perhaps mostly because (as my mother told me after i discussed my interview outfit) i fall more into the "scientist" category than the "sexy" category, and sex sells, darling.<br />
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ok, quick updates are finished. here we are at the grand finale: we may have found the source of our adorable dog's nearly year-long battle with terrible health. on sunday, we visited my grandparents, and in the car on the way there, dess looked like this,<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgH_O-sh228PlSQM4qtGGiswV54DFXcJQ4u2Y9dl_ihaNq5Cx2QGvFv9atzsiex59E0AKNiBpkC-pj2TWhiOfdB7yxDfDEZMiNGK5hUbMoa55K28j27AROsdtPPl1WCKW3hae2xh4YwEoKj/s1600/2011-07-10_12-03-58_345.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgH_O-sh228PlSQM4qtGGiswV54DFXcJQ4u2Y9dl_ihaNq5Cx2QGvFv9atzsiex59E0AKNiBpkC-pj2TWhiOfdB7yxDfDEZMiNGK5hUbMoa55K28j27AROsdtPPl1WCKW3hae2xh4YwEoKj/s320/2011-07-10_12-03-58_345.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">which is to say: normal. on the way out of the car, she hopped from the back seat into the front of the car and smacked her head into the center console. she takes after me in that she's an epic klutz and is used to minor injurious encounters with inanimate objects, so she was totally unfazed by this and we all spent the beautiful day in/by the pool.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">at the end of the day, my brother clay noticed that her head was swollen just above her right eye, but it was relatively minor and we all attributed it to her small accident in the car. imagine our surprise then, when by last night (tuesday), the bump was even bigger and she seemed to be running a fever. i woke up around 4 am to find her curled up in what i can only assume is the canine fetal position on the couch, with a scorching fever and zero energy. by 8:30 this morning, we were at the vet, where i guess i assumed he would tell us she had a bee sting or an allergic reaction, hand us medication and let us take her home. instead, he immediately diagnosed her with a massive abscess and told us to pick her up in the afternoon after her surgery. i can proudly say i waited until we got to the car until i dissolved into hysterics.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">luke went to work, promising to come home early to help me bring her home, and i spent the day cleaning, sweeping and folding laundry to try to distract myself from feeling like a horrible mother. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">i don't have a photo of her head lump pre-surgery mostly because i was content to think it was just a knot resulting from her bumping her noggin. however, you can pretty much assume that whatever she looked like when we dropped her off, it was overwhelmingly horrific to pick her up looking like this:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyaptSbeRLjvU8Nmx4r09ApNtfBxKiaI37pX9egF6Zh1A_EXve4egPeHMB65nNZ3OsEKkrPAXc1b1SdwGJ2fRjjGkG9WEr3OspwLxJTQsMyCVD4dSu-CScZL8m1r4nNQBBkCmd8nqvzkpe/s1600/2011-07-20_16-28-21_468.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyaptSbeRLjvU8Nmx4r09ApNtfBxKiaI37pX9egF6Zh1A_EXve4egPeHMB65nNZ3OsEKkrPAXc1b1SdwGJ2fRjjGkG9WEr3OspwLxJTQsMyCVD4dSu-CScZL8m1r4nNQBBkCmd8nqvzkpe/s320/2011-07-20_16-28-21_468.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">her abscess lanced, draining tube in place, with blood and pus running down the right side of her face. it is horrific in every sense of the word. the vet pulled us aside before he gave her back to us and told us it was one of the worst infections he'd ever seen. apparently, it had been festering long enough to dissolve some of the bone of her skull, so much so that he even found pus in her sinuses. a closer look:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj10lEEwulSQbz8LmDTzP9xhhB0juzy133d152HgmZbkX3nNHOjrLROufw830ChuFLbwpGzgDwLGfK5snSv_1lJU18QRHwDwTcnYtCH8dFqcI2lBczM-279BQAua6n9ukFnT7bkBwJsPVoc/s1600/dess.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj10lEEwulSQbz8LmDTzP9xhhB0juzy133d152HgmZbkX3nNHOjrLROufw830ChuFLbwpGzgDwLGfK5snSv_1lJU18QRHwDwTcnYtCH8dFqcI2lBczM-279BQAua6n9ukFnT7bkBwJsPVoc/s320/dess.jpg" width="320" /></a> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">the first thing we did when we got home, after feeding her several treats and making sure she could still drink out of her bowl with that cone around her neck, was to sit next to her with paper towels and a bowl of warm water and wash the dried fluid off her fur. as unbelievably terrible as it looks, the swelling is enormously improved and her fever is gone, so i guess she's on the road to recovery. still, the idea that this shy, adorable, cuddly mutt, who is our first child in many ways, has an open, draining, odorous* wound on her face is heartbreaking.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">the worst part of all of this is that this dog has had a raging infection in her skull for probably the entire time she's been with us (since we picked her up from the rescue last november) and we had no idea. luke and i are trying to be positive and focus on the fact that we have maybe at last hit upon the root cause of all her other, less traumatic medical problems. this centralized condition could have been the source of all her previous ear infections and recent eye problems. by addressing this larger issue, we're hoping we'll remedy her problematic health.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">i'm still completely blown away that a) she had such an ugly infection and no one knew and b) that the abscess went from nothing to full-blown baseball size in three days. i'm crossing my fingers and my toes that once she heals up from this, she can enjoy many, many years of health. right now, though, i'm just hoping for rest and a speedy recovery.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr3Kk3dh6Mha_gjmYv06OZH1i61P58UduUUSJz5M1lFfiTPKjX66vgRt9FMZ_Di6D4OE-AP9sbg-NJpjV6Jlhwt1t0HovoqSxhyKK6ujO2PhVXEf82ApkQU1KJiUTf_NB3bms_MZmunsCL/s1600/2011-07-20_19-21-43_746.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr3Kk3dh6Mha_gjmYv06OZH1i61P58UduUUSJz5M1lFfiTPKjX66vgRt9FMZ_Di6D4OE-AP9sbg-NJpjV6Jlhwt1t0HovoqSxhyKK6ujO2PhVXEf82ApkQU1KJiUTf_NB3bms_MZmunsCL/s320/2011-07-20_19-21-43_746.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">*i've smelled a lot of unpleasant things in the last year, but i can solemnly swear that nothing has smelled as bad as the weeping wound above dess's eye. it smells like sickness and i think that makes it worse.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
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</div>Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-76896805044270747032011-07-07T09:28:00.000-07:002011-07-07T09:28:49.971-07:00needlingi'm going to get a hepatitis shot in an hour and i'm about one hundred percent sure i'm going to cry like a baby. a) i have a pretty intense hatred of needles and b) hepatitis shots are given in your non-dominant arm for a reason (namely, that they hurt like a biatch and prevent you from doing any real work with your arm for a few days). side note: i love that i'm discussing these vaccinations as if i'm the only person in the universe who has ever had to suffer through one and as though not <i>every college student in the country</i> has had to get the shots.<br />
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anyway, i'm not pleased. however, doing the work that i'm doing (which may or may not include handling many strange dead things from unknown locations) has prompted me to try to overcome my fear of long, sharp metal objects entering my skin and just get the damn vaccination already (well, if we're being honest, i should say "again," as i had to have it to start my undergrad career seven years ago). also, i scratched myself through a glove yesterday (meaning the glove did not tear, but i still got a small, hopefully protected, poke) and now i'm freaking out. regardless of whether or not the glove broke (and it didn't, which to my mind bears repeating) and regardless of whether or not i bled (i didn't, as the scratch was perhaps as superficial as one can be while still be considering a scratch), the fact that i was messy with foulness and got a small scrape is really upsetting. sometimes, as i macerate things and get disgusting and smelly, i take a step back and think to myself, "how did the vegetarian child of an enormous hypochondriac find herself working elbow-deep in forensics?" it is an interesting life path for anyone, but for me, as i still carry around my mom's extreme health mania and tendency for exaggeration and hysteria, it's even more surprising. i love it in practice for all the reasons i always thought i'd love it in theory, because we really are helping to build back identities and i think that's fascinating and noble. however, i can love it and appreciate my opportunities and still not jump for joy about exposing myself to disease by slicing myself.<br />
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thus, doctor's office, here i come! yay.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-45243432721492157162011-07-05T16:24:00.000-07:002011-07-05T16:25:41.157-07:00whirlwind of crazei've been blogless for a literal age and that upsets me. it's not intentional and is certainly not due to our lives being stable and boring lately. sadly, on or around the last day i posted, my computer stopped recognizing the internet. this should probably concern me more than it does, but surprisingly, i don't really care. or, rather, i don't care enough to take the laptop to an apple store or call time warner. it's been over a month now and i've cracked my laptop open a grand total of two times, each time hoping that it had miraculously healed itself as spontaneously as it broke. nope. however, i'm kinda enjoying it. i'm using my phone for the basics, like email and facebook, and am stealing luke's computer for bigger projects (such as watching "extreme makeover: weight loss edition" while stuffing my face full of cupcakes). reasons for my lack of interest in computer problems: in addition to my being hugely lazy now that the school year is over, i also kinda love not staring at my computer screen all the time. gone are the days of checking facebook and watching tv and talking to luke at the same time. honestly, no one needs that much stimulation. i'll probably need to figure out the computer situation by the time school rolls around again, but in the meantime, i'll survive. <br />
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recent happenings:<br />
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1) i finished my first year of grad school with a 4.0. yipee! this last quarter was one for the record books, in terms of all-consuming stress and anxiety. i have never in my life felt anything like it before and i have never been so grateful to leave a quarter behind (especially because it might as well have been ten years long, rather than ten weeks. so. horribly. long.). apparently, the first year is the worst. here's hoping!<br />
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2) i had planned to have a low key summer of odor patrolling and reading cool books i'd ignored throughout the school year. this was going pretty well until about a week ago and a half ago, when i bounced back into the landfill's office on a friday morning after work and was casually told that my full-time job was essentially deleted. cue a tailspin into crazytown that took me through the weekend and halfway through the following week. i cannot believe how difficult it has been for me to just hold down an effing job for two seconds while in school. however, there was a major silver lining to my four days of abject panic, because while scouring craigslist for some leads for myself, i came upon a fantastic librarian opportunity for luke and forwarded the link to him, thinking we could both just through caution to the internet job application wind. as it turns out,<br />
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3) luke applied last tuesday, immediately heard back about the resume he'd submitted and swiftly climbed the interview ladder (totally three or four interviews in all). by friday, we'd had a hugely nerve wrecking week, staying up most of thursday night due to nervous anticipation, the likes of which don't come around unless it's christmas morning. this position was pretty much a dream come true for luke, and waiting to find out if he got the job was. so. hard. it was all insanely worth it though, because HE DID! he got the job and i am so proud of him and so excited for him. it's definitely a career-making move and i'm thrilled that he finally has the security he deserves.<br />
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4) luke getting this fantastic position helped to chill me out, so i've stopped sending out mass responses to internet postings for administrative assistant jobs. tomorrow, i'm going to head over to the local school district classified employment office to hand in a resume and perhaps charm some people in person, because i've decided that it's damn near impossible to stand out and be selected, even just for an interview, when you're competing on the interwebs with ten bazillion other faceless people who also swear that it's been their lifelong dream to file papers at some undisclosed corporate office.<br />
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5) i spent today cleaning up after our impromptu mini fourth of july barbeque, catching up on crappy tv and reading a book. after having what may have been some of the most emotional weeks in recent memory, things are looking up.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-89749897944574227392011-05-20T18:39:00.000-07:002011-05-20T18:39:29.128-07:00barn owl csii worked this morning, but since getting home at 10:45 am, i have done nothing. true, i've thrown some laundry in the washing machine and i just got home from some light marketing (i needed veggie refried beans and an avocado for a mexican feast i'm eating solely to justify the margarita i wanted*), but other than that, i have done absolutely nothing at all. i read about two hundred pages of a terribly awesome mass market paperback true crime book i borrowed from lab, took a nap, caught up on tv, and lounged. i'm currently watching dvr'd episodes of tosh.o and drinking the margarita i've longed for all day. luke had a book club and then a dinner with friends tonight, so i'm by myself with the animals (hence the need to justify the margarita).<br />
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yesterday, i worked in the morning and went immediately to campus to work on mr. artemis hoot. i did his torso. i'm leaving his little head for next week because i'm terrified that his beak will go the way of the talons - namely, dissolve into nothing in the simmering water. i had a much better day with him. nothing was particularly broken or destroyed and everything came clean pretty easily, meaning it was way less stressful than last week. also, i found a mouse skull in his abdomen, which, being the weirdo that i am, i found pretty effing amazing. i felt like i was on barn owl csi.<br />
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tomorrow morning, i'm walking with some friends in a march of dimes five-mile walk. i'm really excited about seeing my friends and all the babies and, for once, walking for miles early in the morning with people to keep me company (my only complaint about odor patrolling at this point is that it gets a little boring alone). what i'm not looking forward to tomorrow is the hours i'll be spending in the lab organizing for "lab clean-up day." yipee! however, by tomorrow afternoon, all three previous pirates movies luke and i ordered should arrive and we're marathoning them with his brother. i suppose i can handle a few hours of craziness in the middle of an otherwise fabulous day. you'll hear about it, i'm sure.<br />
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*i ended frying up two corn tortillas into taco shells (like my mommy used to). couple those shells with the marg, rice, beans and my couch, and i'm practically on vacation. the only thing missing is luke. :(Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-52929085865874830352011-05-15T09:54:00.000-07:002011-05-15T09:55:05.733-07:00it was a hootas it turns out, the barn owl (who i've creatively named hoot) was dead and tagged and shoved into a plastic bag in catalogue room in 1984, making it a mummy for longer than i've been alive. it's entire left side was crushed (skull, pelvis, wing, etc) so now i get to obsess about how i'll probably fail my project on the (incorrect) grounds that i snapped all his bones while cleaning them. awesome. also, apparently bird talons don't hold up well while being simmered in baking soda and meat tenderizer. just fyi.<br />
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suffice to say, i did legs and wings and stopped because the whole enterprise was stressing me out. this means i have to dedicate another full day to the boiling and stripping of an ancient animal carcass, but until that day comes, i've decided not to think about it.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-87639132583046021332011-05-11T14:55:00.000-07:002011-05-11T14:55:21.874-07:00i am not a freak. i am a scientist.interestingly enough, today is wednesday and i actually have an answer to the full-time work question. (things rarely work out as i envision them, obviously.) that answer is<i> i'm full-time again</i>, which is super awesome. i'm a little sad that the sleeping in i'd envisioned for tomorrow morning and friday won't be happening, but honestly, getting up at 5 am is far less brutal than wondering how i'm gonna pay the bills, so i'll handle it.<br />
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tomorrow, i'm starting my "maceration project" in advanced osteology, which means i will essentially be cutting apart a mummified barn owl and boiling its bones in baking soda until they sparkle. that makes me sound like a psychopath, i understand, but it's actually the merging of two very important parts of my life; namely, learning how to process skeletons and doing things for the tar pits, as the animals we're working on are going to be part of the page museum's comparative collection. see? museums do this stuff all the time, guys, so i'm not a freak. i'm a<i> scientist</i>.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-15608041571775171692011-05-10T08:04:00.000-07:002011-05-10T08:04:17.794-07:00a friend of mine just had an adorable baby girl, so there has been much baby-crafting going on around here lately (and by "much" i mean "when i find the time" - it's taken me two and a half weeks to applique three burp cloths, which is not only shameful but also very sad). there has also been much talk about not sleeping at night. my friend doesn't sleep at night because she has <i>a human baby</i>. i don't sleep at night because i have a dog that snores and a gluttonous cat (i say this with love) who can no longer wait for dawn to get his breakfast and instead spends the hours of 4 am and 5 am swatting me in the face until i throw him off the bed in a rage, feed him and then feel guilty about my said rage for the entire day.<br />
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also, as luke and i were eating breakfast this morning, we were talking about countering bethenny frankel's "skinnygirl" empire with something called "fattygirl," which would promote eating what you want and not obsessing about being a shadowy stick figure when all you really want is a margarita. then, luke said, "and you could be the spokesperson."<br />
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i nearly choked to death on my poorly microwaved oatmeal.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-2563634542210504502011-05-07T22:21:00.000-07:002011-05-07T22:25:54.768-07:00ocho de mayoi guess i'm feeling better than i have been. i guess. there are some irons in the job fire, but i think that until i can land a stable adult job after graduation (read: probably in 2013), i won't be totally ok with how my financial life is playing out. i should know by the beginning of next week whether or not i can work full-time again, so i will either be in a super fab mood come next wednesday or a super horrible one - which i suppose is sorta the story of this blog recently, right?<br />
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on thursday night, luke and i hosted a cinco de mayo pot luck at the house for my forensic peeps, in an effort to help us all blow off steam by chugging margaritas and punching pinatas (and yes, pinatas were punched). it was a really fun time and even i approved, which is rare because i almost always feel like i could have done something better or been a better hostess or handled things less awkwardly. all the significant others got along, there was much tequila and i wore a sombrero fascinator that i made with my mom, so pretty much everything was right up my alley.<br />
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tomorrow is our first wedding anniversary, which is blowing my mind. a) i can't possibly be old enough to be married in the first place and b) it's already been a year?!? i can't believe it! well, actually, i can. this year has definitely been a doozy, what with the moving and the starting school and the business starting and the no stable jobs for either of us and the dog and OMG NO STABLE JOBS FOR EITHER OF US. i think, as cheesy and horrible as this sounds, all the insanity of the past year has truly brought luke and i closer together. we lived together for years without making significant progress on how to reliably split up housework or accurately manage our time together and now, in the span of about nine months, we have legitimately worked through most of our b.s. and actually <i>grown</i>. as people and as a couple. granted, i could have lived with reaching this point without freaking out constantly about having zero dollars for practically my entire first year of grad school, but honestly, i'm very, very happy that this maturity hit us, however it happened.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-83555643276604262792011-05-01T11:48:00.000-07:002011-05-01T11:53:17.125-07:00i've had a fabulous weekend thus far, full of studying and family and friends and parks and foods and royal weddings. things have been good.<br />
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another thing this weekend has been full of thus far is job applications. full to the brim. and this leads me to part two of "why i've been a (more) miserable bitch for two weeks." drumroll please: my odor patrolling hours were cut from full-time to two days a week. this was due to no fault of my own (i assume), because they hired several more people despite only opening up six more shifts per week and in order to accommodate all the new peeps, my schedule needed to be pruned. got it. my issue is this: i am really, really tired of looking for stable work. i mean, at this point, i'm obviously willing to do anything (as i was getting up at 5 am monday through friday to walk six miles through neighborhoods trying to catch smells). and even that apparently isn't enough dedication to secure me more than two months of reasonable paychecks.<br />
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it has been outrageously stressful to be riding a seemingly never-ending wave of excitement about new jobs followed by horror and despair when they are either eliminated or downsized or otherwise rendered moot. it has made me sick (as in, actually). compound my consta-anxiety with the collective delusion of the entire world that my "being in school" somehow serves as a barrier against needing to work to finance my life and you have me not wanting to go anywhere or see anyone or do anything that is not explicitly required of me either in my current job description or my master's program. (this delusion is perhaps perpetuated by the lucky few who get stipends when attending graduate school. suffice to say, i'm not at one of those schools. if we use lab disposables, we need to replace them personally.)<br />
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i'm so frustrated by how difficult it has been for me to find a job i can rely on and even more so by the fact that i always seem to be just on the verge of getting on top of things (such as paying off credit cards, planning trips/events/backyard makeovers, etc) when i suddenly find myself without funds. blarg. for realz.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3111882056240068700.post-57337662405181321822011-04-29T09:00:00.000-07:002011-04-29T09:00:38.262-07:00wowzersi haven't posted in a while almost entirely because i've been a little miserable lately and despite trying to convey that in several entries over the last two weeks, i just couldn't feel good about blasting the internet with all the venom and crazy i've been feeling lately. i'm not as much of a sadcloud now, having spent the last few mornings potting plants like a zen master and hanging a hammock in the backyard with luke and plotting out my summer vegetable garden/backyard bench plan.<br />
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here's the issue: i feel like i've been very selfish lately. i used to be someone who did and did and did for other people, usually at my own expense. it never mattered because i had the time and the energy and the general get-up-and-go to be for other people what i never could for myself; namely, a support system, a beaming, bouncing enthusiastic crazy who showed up to every event, dried every tear and was forever willing to go out of my way for my friends. in the last year or so (possibly more), i've had to shut a lot of that part of me down. i don't like it and i'm not excited about it, but i think i needed it. thus, i have mixed feelings. i've been passive about friendships and people i adore and have made a genuine second career out of bailing on plans and this makes me feel horrible, considering how much i love the people in my life and how terrible i know i've been to them. on the flip side, since last year, i've gotten married, moved into a house (in an area that effectively puts me millions of miles away from any group of friends i've got), gotten a puppy (holy cannoli, if i'd only known...), been unable to find anyone willing to hire me, and, most insane of all, started grad school, which has kicked my ass all over town since september. all these things have been a drain on my physical ability to do other things, as i'm always in my car driving the length of the city or at school studying and getting my ass handed to me by anatomy tests or at home eating milk chocolate and almond candy bars trying not to die from stress. my inability to handle any more than what's on my plate at the moment is a bad thing. i don't like being so consumed with things outside myself that i can't be a functioning member of my own life. <br />
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however, the last year has been incredible for me as a person. i feel like i am more unapologetically myself than i ever have been. for better or worse, i can now say whatever the hell is on my mind and if people think i'm out of my gourd, so be it. i realized at a family party recently that there are units of my own extended family who have no idea what to make of me, and that's totally fine. i rarely feel uncomfortable in my own skin these days and that is remarkable in itself considering i spent most of my formative years feeling like a hideous mutant that belonged up in a bell tower. <br />
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therefore, as insane as this year has been, as horrible as i've been at making plans and sticking to them, i know that ultimately, this is all good. i have had time to do things for myself (although not necessarily by myself) and have had experiences that challenged me in ways i've never been challenged before. i've learned to stick up for myself and my beliefs and i know now that regardless of any outside influence, i know who i am and what i stand for and i would gladly do this whole breathless, crazy year over again if it meant getting this much clarity about my life.<br />
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to sum: i apologize to everyone i haven't seen in ages. just know that while i've been an absentee friend, i've also been a whirling dervish.Sarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08714699901484486535noreply@blogger.com0